Transforming...with Carol Lynn Pearson

August 2009

Dear Friends, 

Thanks for so many great responses to my newest book, The Lord Is My Shepherd: Inspiration for Couples.  One of you told me to save 22 for Christmas presents, as everyone needs to read it.  For those who weren’t able to check out the two sections available on my website, please see http://www.clpearson.com/shepherd.htm.  

I love this little bit from the section “He Restoreth My Soul”:                 

                  Your soul, my love, is the breath of God
                  And I am its guardian.
                  I see it soar
                  I see it sink.

                   And when the blows of this world
                  Take your godly breath away
                  When I read doubt or defeat in your eyes
                  When I see your soul suffer – 

                  I will help restore it....

ON THIS FLIGHT, I AM GAY! 

          Recently I have been rooting for the citizen rebellion in Iran.  A photo of one of the protestors dying--Neda Agha Soltan--was captured on video and spread around the world in hours. The rebellion continued, and I was particularly moved one morning a few days later to see in my newspaper the photo of a young Iranian holding a sign that expressed his solidarity with the fallen woman:  “I AM NEDA!”
 

           Years ago as I was doing research into Mormon history, I came across the story of Missourian Alexander Doniphan, a brigadier general in the state militia.  In November 1838, when anti-Mormon troops surrounded Far West and forced its surrender, General Samuel Lucas ordered Doniphan to immediately execute Joseph Smith and six other Mormon leaders.  Doniphan, putting himself in danger of being executed himself for insubordination, told his commanding officer, “It is cold-blooded murder. I will not obey your order. My brigade will march for Liberty at 8:00 tomorrow morning, and if you execute these men I will hold you personally responsible before an earthly tribunal, so help me God.”

            I’ve always remembered that moving story.  On that particular day, Alexander Doniphan, out of solidarity and a sense of justice, said symbolically, “I AM A MORMON.”

 
      I love a story told me by my friend Sikoki Layton (see the chapter on him and his partner Richard, “Life Is a Song,” on page 262 of No More Goodbyes: Circling the Wagons around Our Gay Loved Ones: http://www.clpearson.com/personal_gifts.htm) and I asked him to write it out for me:

            A number of years ago, while employed by Pan American World Airways--I served as a purser on a flight from Honolulu, Hawaii to Auckland, New Zealand. An hour or so after take off, I received a call from the captain, who sounded very angry, “Sikoki, you’d better get someone else up here to bring in our meals!  I’m not having some (expletive) faggot prancing in and out of my cockpit!” 

      I told him I’d be right there, marched up the spiral staircase, and used my key to enter the flight deck.  Trying to keep my voice calm, I asked the captain exactly what Lincoln, the flight attendant who was scheduled to serve the cockpit that day, had done to upset him so.  “Did you get your meals and beverages when you called for them?” I asked.
      “Yes.”
      “Were they all right?”
      “They were fine.”
      “Was Lincoln ever rude or disrespectful to you?”
      “No.”
      “Then I don’t see what the problem is.”
      “It’s just like he’s a butterfly in heat, and it really makes me sick!  I won’t have any (expletive, again) faggot coming into my cockpit, ever!  Is that clear?”  I was shaking, but I summoned up all the courage and composure I could muster, and looked him straight in the eye.  “If you are telling me that because Lincoln is gay--you won’t allow him in the cockpit--then it’s going to be a very long flight and you’re going to get very thirsty and hungry.  You should know that not only is Lincoln gay, but I’m gay, and so is every member of this crew!  So, as those are your orders, no one will come through this door the rest of the flight!”

      I immediately gathered the entire flight attendant crew to brief them on what had just transpired.  I said, “I know that about half of you actually are gay, and to the others, I apologize...”

       “No, no,” all of the straight attendants said.  “On this flight we are all gay!”

      About halfway through the flight, the captain came downstairs, rather sheepishly, to apologize.  And to get some food.  I told him to remember that, regardless of our differences, we are all human beings, who deserve respect, and that the sooner we can focus on what we have in common, the better off we’ll all be. 
 

      I think about Sikoki’s story from time to time.  I am not able to look at injustice and turn away.  I am not called--like the young Iranian who held up the sign--to stand in solidarity with Neda.  I have a number of times--like Alexander Doniphan--spoken in defense of Mormons.  But somehow there is a particular calling that life has given to me. 

      I am a 100% heterosexual woman.  But--as long as many of my brothers and sisters find themselves unwelcome in their own families--as long as they do not feel understood and respected in their churches--as long as I receive stories of yet another suicide...

      ...On this flight--I am gay.
 

 ********
 

 SUICIDE WATCH: From an email I received last week--

“....I was just told of a young LDS man, a returned missionary, husband, father of three, who had been in deep turmoil with homosexual feelings for at least ten years.  Recently he took his own life.  His father, who holds an important church position, had been very hateful to him, telling him over and over how ashamed and disgusted he was with his son’s homosexuality.”

Everyone who cares about this subject can make a difference by giving a copy of No More Goodbyes to someone you think is struggling or to a leader in your church. http://www.clpearson.com/personal_gifts.htm.  The book has saved lives and helped to heal families.  And please remember the national hotline for troubled gay youth  http://thetrevorproject.org/helpline.aspx.


AUTOGRAPHED BOOKS.  Free copy of the stage play, Facing East with any order on CLP website through August 15.  Also – can’t wait to sign for you the brand new The Lord is My Shepherd: Inspiration for Couples!  Give yourself or your loved one a signed copy of Embracing Coincidence; In Love Again and Always; Beginnings and Beyond, or any of the other many Carol Lynn Pearson books available at http://www.clpearson.com/personal_gifts.htm

 
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TELEPHONE CONSULTATIONS.  Could you benefit from a telephone consultation/conversation with Carol Lynn about any of the issues with which she has experience?   http://clpearson.com/consultations.htm.    

      “I can’t believe how many wonderful doors you opened up for me in our conversation!  Truly, I see so many things differently now!”  L.

 
RETREATS.  Interested in bringing Carol Lynn to your area for a retreat on any of the subjects she specializes in?--The Divine Feminine--The Magic and Meaning of Coincidence--Gay Issues--Spirituality.  Contact her at clp@clpearson.com. 

      “I’m still in heaven from our great retreat.  I did not know how much I missed Our Mother.  And guess who is also glad I went?  My husband!  He says it’s been a long time since his wife was this happy.”  J.


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      May all of us be using these lovely August days for fun and love and learning.  And may we remember--

You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover is yourself.  --Alan Alda        
                                  

 Love and blessings from your friend,

       Carol Lynn